Mean Girls: We talk a great deal about them, but what are we personally doing, day by day, moment by moment so the infection doesn’t spread?

Muktananda was a great Indian saint and an avatar that came to the United States. He wrote many books, which I, myself have read. The below passage gave me a very distinct vision of how I act the way I do and how everything touches everything. While many times I have experienced this, Muktananda drove the point home and to this day, reading this makes me pause about my own behavior with women.

Here is a direct excerpt from his book:

“I am reminded of a verse from Krishnasuta, who says, “In the world one becomes one’s own enemy and begins to treat everyone else with hostility.” Because of your own perversity you begin to look upon everyone else perversely; you project your own faults onto other people. As a result you begin to see faults even in those who have none, you begin to see impurities even in those who are pure. Whatever man does for or against another, he really does for or against himself……..

I am reminded of a story of a palace of mirrors told by Swami Ram Tirtha. A large, violent, and brutal dog got into the palace of mirrors. He shouldn’t have been allowed to go in, but somehow he was.

He was surrounded by mirrors on all sides. He ran in one direction, and he saw many other dogs running at him. Then he ran in a different direction, and he found just as many dogs running at him. Then he ran a different direction, and he found just as many dogs running at him from that direction.

Then he ran a third direction, and he saw the same thing. He looked upward, and he saw many dogs looking down at him. The frightened him.

He stopped running and wondered what he could do to save himself. He began to bark in sheer terror and as he barked, he found thousands of dogs barking at him from all sides. This enraged him. It made him mad. He began to jump up and down and thousands of dogs around him jumped up and down. He kept jumping up and down. Finally he collapsed.

When the watchman saw the corpse, he threw it outside.

This is exactly the condition of everyone in this world.“

The last line stopped me dead in my tracks.

This is exactly the condition of the world, and I am a part of this world. I do this.

We, as women need to stop being barking dogs with one another. See your small self as it is and push is aside to unity yourself with another.

Try this by:

  • noticing when a younger woman comes to you and you recoil out of jealousy
  • coaching another women even when you don’t think you have time
  • identifying key women with talent and promoting them to position of power
  • seeing each woman as your sister, creating unity where there once was division
  • reading and understanding what the mean girl concept on Plaid For Women is really about
  • Stop talking about the problem, and quietly be the solution.

Talking never got us anywhere.

Join the movement.