Last week we discussed that the emotion of guilt can weigh you down. It is the invisible weight that tugs at your heart. So are you ready to stamp out the unhealthy guilt? This will work only if you are willing to give up the tumultuous stomach disorders, headaches, and insomnia. You have to be ready to commit to following the steps in order to become free of guilt. As you read the steps, know that it is a process and it won’t happen overnight, but your ultimate goal is within the next two weeks, you will let it go. Okay, so how do you lose this weight?
Step One- Excuse yourself, you are only human not super woman.
Let me suggest as hard as this may feel, you can only do what you can do. While we are responsible for the totality of our children, we are just human. There are only so many hours in the day and we only so much energy to accomplish before we run out of steam. We are not like the super heroes who have been given extraordinary powers to conquer the world. Just focus on what you can do.
Step Two – Don’t Blame Yourself for the Bad Decisions that your Kids Make
What they decided to do is not your fault. We have already discussed that we are not perfect. Some how this is associated with that guilt stick. We nurture, teach, instill, yell, fuss, cry, beg, and use every teachable moment and still Lexi may not make the right decision. Sure they know right from wrong but it doesn’t always mean they will choose right. I can remember the day I got a call from the school to say that one of my children had cursed toward the teacher. What? Not my child! I don’t even curse. Where did that come from? Well, then there was this need to prove to the teacher and all involved that we raise our kids better than that. Wake up call, kids make their own choices just like we did. They were not always right. I would venture to say there are things you did growing up that your mother still doesn’t know you did. I’m not sharing. Never, say never, because you don’t know what your darling kids will do. It’s not because you are not a good parent, it’s because they are people and make their own choices. Be there to pick them up when they fall and remember, it’s not your fault.
Step Three – This too will pass, to everything, there is a season.
How calming knowing that life happens in seasons. As mothers, we know that our kids are only babies for short time and then there are other stages from toddlers, to pre-schoolers, elementary, pre-teens, adolescence, teenagers, young adult, adult. Each season of life moves so quickly. Sometimes when you are in the midst of the season, it seems as it may last forever. The season, I recall that seems like it was going to last forever was diapers, pull ups and potty training. With four children right in a row, I was convinced that there would never be a day that I wasn’t involved with someone’s bathroom needs. Now it seems like it was a long time ago. As mothers we also experience seasons of our lives. It may be that you feel that you have to sacrifice certain things or even yourself for your children, but only for a time. Make a conscious effort to enjoy and find contentment with each season of your life. Enjoy the good and endure the unpleasant, knowing this too will pass.
Step Four – Let it go
What ever you, your kids, your spouse, your parents, caregivers, friends, did or didn’t do that you thought they should have, let it go. The more baggage that you hang on to, the more your will be weighed down with junk. Just know that each night when you lay your head on the pillow, be able to say that I have done my best for the day and tomorrow the counter sets at zero.
Now repeat the pledge below…….
I pledge to become guilt free, to have less stress, and take care of me to be the best mom I can be!
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