I decided to put myself in Time OUT. Not anything I did wrong but my husband has been diagnosed with COVID. We are insulated in a quarantine bubble in our home, away from those we love, those we care about, and others that may cross our paths.
Our kitchen is now our pharmacy and our phones and computers are our connection to the outside world. Doors are locked as packages arrive daily.
Masks are on within the confines of our home. Our oximeter tells us our oxygen levels daily. A number below 90 means we are heading to the ER. For now I am asymptomatic while my husband is sequestered in our guest room with fatigue, chills, and sore throat but no fever. In the night I can hear him coughing as I stand outside his door.
Our daily diet now includes:
High doses of vitamin D3
High doses of Vitamin C
Acetaminophen for aches and pains
Water and more water
Time Out is lonely, no kissing allowed and I miss the full on body hugs. Pajamas are the new fashion rage and my studio is confined to the interior of my home as my camera and I keep clicking away. For now, time is that place where I find laughter in the voices that care, where the stillness ensues as I gather strength from my devotions praying for others suffering. I find comfort in the lives of others and in the books written by Charles Martin, and with loving eyes I see that time carries a mystery of another day.
As I wander around the house, I see the dust buddies in each corner, I see the indention on the chair where Joe parks his butt, I see the soft filter of light that warms me as I place a vase of flowers on my window sill. I miss the joy and laughter of spontaneous gatherings and the fleeting fellowship on a Sunday morning. In the night I reach for a hand to hold and realize, I am alone. My husband is in another room wrapped in a cocoon of blankets and sweet dreams, I hope.
The weird part is you never know what the day is going to bring. My husband’s symptoms go from good to bad on a daily basis. This virus is in control and just when you think you are on the mend, it comes back and bites you hard, thankful you have a full tank of gas in your car just in case.
With mask on, I walk into my office and take a book off the shelf. Jesus Calling had been my solace while going through cancer 10 years ago. I opened the page to Feb. 4th and felt wings wrap around me. As I read every word I am awed by His perfect timing. “Bring Me your weakness, and receive My peace. Accept yourself and your circumstances just as they are.” I find courage in these words as I let go of what I cannot change.
During this time we celebrated many birthdays with cards and phone calls. Our anniversary was a day to remember. I told my husband I think God has a sense of humor as we enjoyed a bottle of wine six feet a part and masks on. We both promised each other a much needed, good attitude adjustment after our bubble spurts. I am dreaming of watching another sunrise side by side and feeling the sand under our feet.
I laugh when I think about a solicitor that came to our door. He rang the door bell several times and then knocked on our door?
Hmmm, I wonder who that could be?
Crack the door.
Unwanted Smiling (I think) masked solicitor greets me.
Gotcha when I stated, “COVID in the house.”
WHAT!? No Goodbye.
For two weeks my husband and I have subsisted. I think I could write a book on Pandemic Recipes that I experimented with as we maintain our distance knowing we are doing our part to keep others safe.
Since I have tested negative for the COVID virus, I head out the door to the Texas Motor Speedway for my first Pfizer shot. My husband has to wait at least 14 days before he can get vaccinated.
Today is the first day since we started Time OUT that I awaken with a smile and actually thought about tomorrow!! Within these four walls, a door opens as a light of hope enters, providing the strength to let thankfulness and trust be our guide.