Let’s face it, we are busy! There isn’t enough time in a day to complete everything we would like to accomplish. As the New Year begins, so do the different media outlets (i.e. television commercials, magazine ads, etc.) psychologically playing judge and jury regarding our image. Granted, some people need to reduce weight for general overall health and well-being; however, these people should be consulting healthcare professionals. There is nothing more ridiculous than having some cheeky 20 something holding up a pair of jeans that could be used to tent their home for a flea infestation bombing, trying to convince people these jeans were once theirs and because of this product, they can look like a super model. If only life was that easy! This type of psychological sabotage begins a disconnect between the morale value of ourselves and our self-view. How many times have you looked in the mirror only to curse your very existence because you don’t live up to societies expectations? It is time to get reconnected with YOURSELF.

After going through chemotherapy for Ovarian Cancer and then radiation for two brain tumors, my body was unrecognizable to me. I began the disconnection of what is important and what is not. I looked in the mirror and saw a bald, hairless image of a stranger. I had no hair, no eyelashes, no eyebrows. My nasal hairs were even missing. Frankly, in my aesthetic mind’s eye, I looked like the insurance lizard. As if that wasn’t bad enough, the chemotherapy bloat packed on the added self-loathing. I felt unattractive to my significant other which then generated self-doubt of our relationship, not by his doing, but my own. My self-confidence was in the toilet. It wasn’t until my last treatment that I looked around the room at others receiving chemotherapy and I actually slapped my self-loathing, self-pitying self and realized that I was ALIVE and thriving while those around me were not doing as well. How selfish was I being about my exterior appearance? Most of the people around me would give anything to be in my situation. My guy didn’t care what I looked like on the outside. My appearance didn’t even equate in our relationship. I was the same person I was prior to the medicine. When I began appreciating LIFE, I learned to love myself again which changed how I reconnected with MYSELF and my relationship became better.

What in your life is causing you to disconnect? What self-expectations have you set forth that you hang your “worth” on? Perfection is a myth. It doesn’t exist. However, when I think of perfection, I now think of kindness. I think of generosity. I think of compassion. In my personal dictionary, this is how I define perfection. I’m not a size 4 anymore. My hair is greyish white. I am great with that, I am perfect. I now look in the mirror and openly state “You are perfect! You are ALIVE, you are accepted by those who truly love you!” It doesn’t get any better than that!